Mysterious Thrills

Ink Drawing - Created during The Butterfly Project performance
New Jersey Performing Arts Center, Newark, New Jersey
June 6, 2009
Link to journal entry: Mysterious Thrills

Cypress Trees in Southern France

Link to journal entry

Getting around to Playing

After working for about six hours on the two paintings of Gaudi's walls of brick and stone I felt tight and lacking in creativity. It is one thing to look intently at a scene in front of me and to respond to the details that I pull out of the reality. It is quite another to study a photograph with the same intensity. Photographs are terribly limited when it comes to color. They can't help it. The color is created by pigment, not light. Translating pigment to pigment is quite different from translating light into pigment.

After deciding it was time to stop working on the brick and stones, to let the paintings dry and hope for a bit more energy to come from the next layer of glazing, my choice was to lock up shop and go home or to paint the first layer of glaze onto the last of the Road Series canvases. I had decided to use the painting Morning Dance as inspiration and to see what might happen. The painting is not at blue as it appears here.

With simplicity in mind I began to paint; I began to smile, to feel that rush of pleasure when something unexpected begins to happen. My fatigue vanished and I followed the muse. The final painting is another example of how working on a series results in breaking through barriers and finding myself in a new, unexplored territory. I adore simplicity, yet it is so difficult for me to express well. This painting is finished and I am delighted with the results.

Straube Center Fall Art Show

The exhibit at Monsoon Gallery closes on November 5th and the exhibit at Straube Center opens on November 7th.

Several of the paintings that have been posted over the past five months were not included in the current exhibit at Monsoon Gallery. I eliminated half a dozen from the Road Series and all of the architectural series. The architectural series, inspired by the works of Gaudi, will hang in the Straube Center Exhibit.

Playing with Still Life Design

Limiting my palette in order to develop a better understanding of color has led me to painting a series of small still life studies both in oil and in watercolor. During the cold, winter months I am more inclined to work in a warm studio than I am to paint outdoors as I did in my younger years.

As much as I love throwing the paint and pulling images out of the resulting patterns, I find myself wanting to introduce more layers of human interest in my work. The desire to portray more specific personalities, archetypes and situations requires developing greater drawing skills and brush manipulation. I am delving deeper into the understanding of color in order to portray more specific mood and atmospheric environment for the characters that evolve in the larger paintings.

















At times I feel as if I am taking a giant step backwards. A part of me feels that by now I should have a solid understanding of all the elements of art and be able to simply paint with joy and expression. A greater part of me knows that the reason I continue to paint is because there will always be more for me to learn. I am never bored. I am never complacent. I am always challenged by the extent of what I don't see, don't understand and can't express.
However, I find it necessary, after struggling with the uninspiring realistic representation of a still life object, to treat myself to a bit of play, focusing on the elements of the object that delight me, making them dance through space, releasing them from their comatose state of reality.

The paintings in this series are tiny. The oil paintings are either 5" x 5" or 5" x 8", painted on gessoed, birch plywood. The watercolor paintings are about the same size with a few variations.

Meditation and Painting

When I was a young child, I was given an extraordinary gift, a subscription to a book club. Each month a book containing a collection of stories and poems arrived in the mailbox. The books open doors to worlds I had not experienced on my own.

As an adult I still treasure the gift of a book. This year I received a copy of "The Joy of Living - Unlocking the Secret and Science of Happiness" by Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche, a Buddhist monk. Yongey Mingyur presents the parallels between meditation and neuroscience with humor and simplicity.

My experience with meditation began at the age of fourteen. As an artist, there are times when I am painting without "creating". Those sessions leave me feeling frustrated and empty. When I am "creating" I am usually in the same state of consciousness that I am when I meditate. When I have been asked about this, I have found it difficult to explain. Yongey Mingyur explains my experience. He demystifies meditation and explains how one can be practicing meditation throughout the day during normal activities (such as painting). I am hopeful that this book will awaken readers to their own creativity and the joy that comes along with the creative experience. In my mind, observing one's environment with open eyes and an open heart is new and unique each and every time. Allowing that experience to be expressed and acknowledged even silently within one's own thoughts is creative and joyful whether the feeling is happy or sad.

Image: Music and Art in the Big Bad City by Chris Carter
Mixed Media Collage - Paper and Acrylic on Masonite
Size: 10" x 10"

Metro Madness No.2

This is the completed second painting I began after hearing of my son's close call on the Brussel's Metro. It is an excellent example of working through an emotion and coming out on the other side having survived and having learned several important lessons along the way. I am speaking about myself, not my son, though I believe his own experience was equally as valuable.

This painting was a lesson in "content and intention". I wanted it to express a quality of light, of wisdom, of coming through the darkness to a more balanced state of emotions and mind. I wanted it to be a vision of the larger experience of life, beyond the daily ups and downs.

My uncontrollable state of emotional distress was worked out in the first painting and left me free to move on and explore the post-trauma feelings. This was a new experience for me. I have not used painting in this manner, as a way to work through an experience acknowledging each and every thought and physical sensation, expressing them visually with the intent of reaching a resolution and a clarity of understanding how the experience fits into my life in a way that is positive rather than negative.

Painting: Oil on Kraft Paper "Metro Madness No.2" 24" x 48"